For Therapists Working with Divorce Ambivalent Clients

If you work with couples, you've undoubtedly worked with couples where one or both partners is seriously questioning whether to stay in their relationship.  Read on to learn more about what Discernment Counseling is, when to make a referral for Discernment Counseling, and for information on training opportunities. 

As a certified Discernment Counselor and an official presenter with The Doherty Relationship Institute, Dr. Bordieri offers FREE introductory events for therapists to learn more about Discernment Counseling and trainings for therapists who are looking to increase their clinical competence in working with clients considering divorce.  See below for all dates and registration links.

Working with Divorce Ambivalent Clients Training on May 18th

What is Discernment Counseling?

Discernment Counseling was created to help clients at a crossroads make decisions about the future of their marriage based on a deeper understanding of the problems in their relationship, their contributions to these problems, and their subsequent responsibility for personal change to build a healthy relationship.  Discernment Counseling was also created to prevent "half-hearted" couple's therapy - where one partner agrees to go to therapy but is not really engaged in the process.  Not only is therapy with these couples ineffective, but it can also do harm when divorce ambivalent clients attend therapy just to be able to check the box and say, "we tried therapy."  Discernment counseling is different than couple’s therapy because the goal is not solve current problems, but to unpack them and help partners decide whether to solve these problems.  Each partner is supported in their own discernment process and prepares couples for whichever path they choose. 

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When to Refer to Discernment Counseling

Have a question about whether a couple is a good candidate for Discernment Counseling?  Ask here!

Discernment Counseling is intended for couples where: 

1. They have made a lifelong commitment to one another - married or otherwise.
2. One partner is leaning into the relationship and wants to work to save it in therapy, and the other is leaning out and has serious doubts about the relationship, is considering separation or divorce, and is not committed to attending couple's therapy and/or sees their partner as the "problem" and is unable to see their contributions to the problems in the relationship.   
3. Both partners are aware that the leaning out partner is considering divorce prior to entering Discernment Counseling - this is confirmed in the consultation that Dr. Bordieri will conduct with each partner.  
   

Note: If you have couples that are struggling with ambivalence about whether to stay in their relationship who do not meet these criteria, Dr. Bordieri applies the relevant aspects and structure of Discernment Counseling to her work with these couples and individuals to help them process their ambivalence and get unstuck in their decision making about the future of their relationship.

Events and Trainings for Therapists

FREE Introductions To Discernment Counseling

Attend this free session to learn more about Discernment Counseling.  No Registration Required!

Monday, March 30th from 1pm to 2pm EDT  
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/6198088509  (Meeting ID 619 808 8509)
 
Tuesday, April 28th from 2pm to 3pm EDT  
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/6198088509  (Meeting ID 619 808 8509)

Working with Divorce Ambivalent Clients

This training will help you effectively support clients to make informed and thoughtful decisions about divorce, even in the absence of the other partner in therapy.  

Monday, May 18th from 12pm to 3pm EDT  
(9am to 12pm PST, 10am to 1pm MST, 11am to 2pm CST)

Registration Opening Soon